She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize