And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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