Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Randomize