I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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