as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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