Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize