i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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