And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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