What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
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