you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
