yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Did you pee in the oven last night??
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
