why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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