I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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