My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
