Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
