just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
