guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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