both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
