I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
