Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
