Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Randomize