how can u be prego again
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
The best revenge is premature balding
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Randomize
