Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
