you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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