Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
This is my gift to your gina
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
