so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
