just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I would fuck him just for his dog
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
