Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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