i don't like sucking hair
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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