As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
