after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
