D3 body, D1 cock
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize