you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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