so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Is it because I queefed?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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