In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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