Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
