You really coming over, don't trick.
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Randomize
