just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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