is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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