Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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