is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
