He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Randomize
