Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
