No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
