Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
