Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
