I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Randomize
