what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
