Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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