y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
