I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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